Posts tagged Zach Galifianakis

That’s a real line they’re using to advertise that show “The Newsroom”.  Is anyone else hearing a little “Dog Bites Man” in that?

What is breaking news?

If the news ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

If you break the news, you bought it.

I didn’t go broke from the news.

Obviously there are some men who look good with or without a beard, but for most guys one way is much more flattering on them than the other.  You can’t all have the unwavering sex appeal of Peter Griffin:

I would love to be one of the chicks living in his beard.

So how do you know if you look better with or without a beard?  It’s easy: I’ll tell you!  Or you can just find the celebrity below who you look most like - perhaps Brad Pitt or Ryan Gosling - then read my notes to know where you stand.  It’s pretty important so I hope you’re paying attention.

I have to say that I don’t totally agree with you guys that Brad Pitt is babelicious, so it’s hard for me to make the call here.  But his fucking too-grown-out dirty hippie goatee is disgusting, so I don’t think he really gave me any choice.

Do all male actors have no upper lip?  Is that what you’re ashamed of under there?  You should be more ashamed of your red facial hair, Bale.  Not even Batman could wing his way out of this one.  Go ahead and try.  Wing out of it.

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